20 Questions for Facilitators and Conflict Management Specialist

Meetings have been defined as an interaction where the unwilling, selected from the uninformed, led by the unsuitable, to discuss the unnecessary, are required to write a report on the unimportant. They are hard to lead. At least sixty percent of what a good facilitator does is ask questions and paraphrase. Here are some questions you can try when a group seems stuck:

General Questions

1. “What are you committed to?”

2. “What is getting in your way?”

a.    “What might you or someone do about those barriers?”

3. “What have you tried?”

4. “What have you learned from past attempts to figure this out that might help you now?”

5. “What are some other alternatives?”

6. “Who else could help figure this out?”

a.    “Who cares or has a stake in the outcome?”

7. “What could I do that would feel like support?”

When people are confusing assumptions with facts

8. “What observable data is that based on?”

9. “Would all the parties agree that the observable data is accurate?”

10. “Are there other ways that the data might be interpreted?”

11. “If there were another explanation, what might it be?”

12. “What conclusions have you drawn so far and how did you arrive at those conclusions?”

13. “How could we test that hypothesis?”

When you are trying to build commitment

14. “What would make this more compelling for you?”

15. “Where do you think the resistance is coming from?”

16. “What will progress look like to you?”

17. “How will you handle this if it ends up being more difficult, or slower than you are anticipating?”

When you are trying to build consensus

18. “What parts of this proposal might you be able to build on?”

19. “In saying you oppose this idea I am wondering what specifically you are concerned about.”

20. “So that is what will not work for you. What could work?”